Tag Archives: swag

Don’t Hate…

People are put in our lives for many reasons and sometimes we need to love them even if they are thorns in our side. Jesus says,” It is easy to love a person who loves you back, but much harder to love your enemy“. We are supposed to love those who hate us. That’s right love them back to Christ whether you get along, or not. People need people.

Love them back to Christ…don’t hate them!  How can God‘s spirit possibly be a part of your being if you’re hating? Aren’t you suppose to be your brother‘s and/or sister’s keeper, and aren’t they suppose to be yours? Seriously when a person comes to you for your help what do you do?  If and elderly person needs a young persons help how do you respond? You can either ignore them, lead them into a ditch, leave them alone, or lead them back to God’s pathways.

Nowadays people develop relationships with an attitude of what can you give me, or do for me?  This is a very dangerous mindset, In my opinion, because you could be sacrificing the deepest love, or friendship you can ever imagine, If your  basing all your friendships by what a person can bring to your table. It’s a sad affair, or mindset to be In, because everyone loses at the end.

What’s a world filled with greedy people who only value friendships for their material gain? No man/woman is meant to be an island standing alone, all on their own. That’s why from time to time some of us need to go back and be reminded how people use to treat each other like their own brother’s, or sister’s.

Some of us have lost our touch, focus, and faith in what God will do for us through these new friendships we make.  May be some of us do need to go back to His original plan and purpose for our lives, instead of worrying about who will be our next benefactor in our new relationships.  God is your primary provider and benefactor… We all should seek Him and stop chasing after your own values so that our love life’s will become spiritually richer, then everything else will be added to you!

May be we all should take a moment to exam our hearts each time we meet a new friend to find out why we really want to befriend them in the first place. What are your thoughts?

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Wasting Your Time!

How is something a waste of time if it’s a learning experience? Why do people feel and think that when they get the short end of the stick their at a loss, or their time has been wasted? An associate was telling us about a lady he had been talking with for almost two years over the internet. They seen each other in person before one time, and she had been wanting to see him again, but he

thought she was way to aggressive in some of the conversations.  He felt as if she was a waste his time, more like a sponge person when he needed some of his free time to be absorbed. He said when they finally went out she could not keep

her hands to herself.  I asked him why was he wasting his precious time with a sponge anyway?  He said,” why would I turn down an easy lay? I  get bored, desire conversation, need my ego stroked, and need “cookie” like any other man.” There’s nothing wrong with this type of rational thinking if the person has good intentions for

both parties involved. Don’t get me wrong I’m not supporting being a shag. However, this man did say that “he was really ready to settle down and he thought she’d make a good candidate for a wife.

When you are seeking pleasure only in a relationship then there is a fine line between distinguishing what’s healthy and unhealthy.  When both adults agree to enter  into a relationship for pleasure they are not devaluing  love, because both are in it for pleasure only. Whereas when one person values love and the other person  doesn’t and wants the relationship just for pleasure than the relationship will feel unbalanced. Some women go crazy, or over board when they find out their partner just wanted them for a booty call. Men also feel violated when they feel their being used as sex toys.  It’s not fair for either party! Men and women argue and bitch about this pleasure concept endlessly.

A healthy relationship is based on EQUALITY, where both people in the relationship are considered equal and are treated with dignity and respect (something we all deserve in every relationship we are in). A healthy relationship uses compromise and negotiation to reach decisions that both parties are comfortable with and each person’s voice is valued. When this happens, when neither party tries to have power and control over the other, a non-violent and healthy relationship occurs. Healthy relationships don’t demand conformity or perfect agreement.  Be prepared to compromise or to disagree about some things.

Before you get involved in any intimate relationship you should know what you want. Either an acquaintance who is a person you know, but there not a close friend to you, or an associate who is someone who you befriend and enjoy keeping company with. It doesn’t take that long to figure out what kind of relationship category  a person will fall under in your life. But, It does take time to meet people and get to know them…so, make “small talk”…respond to others…smile…keep trying.   Being friends first is more than a cliché — enjoying someone’s company and becoming relaxed around someone are very important aspects of intimacy. A quality friendship takes time to develop.

Michelle Meadows-Thomas ©2012  Spiritualsoulfood. wordpress.com

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